I thought all the “firsts” were over after the first year.  I was dead wrong.  I didn’t count on the holidays being harder this year than the first time around. When Covid was in full force, I was isolated and alone.  No one was going to other people’s houses, and I stayed home by […]

  All of us want to be accepted by our peers. We seek out groups we want to be part of And hope to become absorbed into their consortium As one of them.   But there is one club that none of us wants to join. It’s the organization of grievers Who are mourning the […]

  There are so many emotions stirring when a loved one dies: Overwhelming sadness, loneliness, anxiety, anger, confusion, worry, And, of course, grief. But what about gratitude?   Is it okay to admit gratitude when your role of caretaker ends, Or your partner doesn’t have to suffer any more indignities Or continue to experience the […]

Leaving a legacy means different things to each of us.  Last month I discussed the many forms of legacy and how honoring our loved ones can shape our own legacy.  But during the last two years as the world has experienced Covid 19, many of us have had our world ripped apart. Aston Verdery, a […]

Leaving a legacy means different things to each of us. To some, a legacy is leaving money or property to their heirs. To others, it is about the lasting impact they leave on the world when they leave it.  This could be a body of work for a writer or actor, a farmer knowing he’s […]

Like a Duck Quack!  Quack!  The language of ducks is singular, just one comical sound.  A unique noise, not like any other creature on this earth makes. I took time to just sit and observe the ducks at our neighbor’s pond one bright day last week.  Mother duck squawked her “Quack! Quack!”  to the brood […]

  When you are a grieving person, You will undoubtedly experience The unpleasant sensation of Griefbursts and gutpunches.   You can’t prepare for either one. They happen when they happen. A griefburst or a gutpunch comes When you least expect it.   There’s not a whole lot of difference Between the two. I consider a […]

Summertime – time for fun!  Beach time, flower gardens, BBQ’s, and picnics in the park.  Summer is time for vacations and enjoying a few lazy afternoons outside. We look forward to time with family and friends. Heartlinks Grief Center had a summertime activity last Friday that has become a summer fun tradition for our family.  […]

Communal Grief I live in a small, close-knit community in Southwestern Illinois where most people know each other.  Generations have lived here and work to make new folks welcome.  When a member of our town dies, we collectively grieve.  You can almost hear the town sigh, “We will miss you.” Grief professionals refer to this […]

Is it better to rip off a bandage in one fast jerk, or is it more advisable to ease it off gradually?  Such a dilemma!   I usually favor getting the pain over with quickly, so I take a deep breath, close my eyes, and rip it off as fast as I can.  There!  Done!  […]